Excerpts from the Peanut Gallery

Just Leave Lindsay A-Lohan!

I return to you dear readers after a short hiatus with due concern to those who have applied to me to hurry my return. I apologise for the delay in posting this last week. What my adoring fans (read: my mom and...susan) don't understand is that this is creative genius we are talking about here. Its like burping on command. You can't just expect me to be able to do it! I wish I could, really I do!! You will have to content yourself with the game highlights for the last two weeks:

-Do you know what I actually love about this country? Walking down the street and buying a bunch of bananas for 3Cordobas (ahem, about 16 cents). That's what I love. I had stopped buying them at home because I got on my sustainable living/social conscious consumption kick, but now that they are grown three feet away, eat your chiquita heart out.

- We went to Masaya the other week to see the big festival they have for San Gironomo (the town's patron saint) who likes to take a morning constitutional once a year. It was so packed! And then of course we had to go to the artisans market, where, gosh darn it, this hammock just forced itself upon us (it would have been rude to deny the very nice saleslady, after all, most disagreeable indeed). And when you are in Masaya, Granada is only a few minutes away. What is in Granada you say? The best darn place to eat chocolate cake and drink coffee you ever did see! It was one of those moments where, if there were any lingering homesickness, it was completely overwhelmed by the plush couches on a breezy courtyard-patio, let alone what was in my mouth. Oooooh those couches will get you every time.

- Well back to the grind the next day right? I suppose I should mention work at some point in this blog (seeing as it be the reason I am here, its not all fun and games... but actually, mostly it is). I went out and did some client visits this week. I went up to our Leon office and visited some clients in the surrounding countryside. I will dedicate more to this in a soon-to-follow post, but for now, the day went really well, I was thrilled to get four visits in- before I was overwhelmed by the beast. By mid-day the queasy upset stomach I had woken up to was firmly planted in my gut and was now giving birth to a dinosaur the size of Texas ("Texas on a big map or Texas on a small map?"). Now I was about an hour and a half from Leon, which is approximately 2 hours from my bed. And of course we had to crawl back to Managua (even here, it doesn't matter that the accident is pulled off to the side of the road, completely out of the way of traffic, we STILL all have to slow down to look). So that was um, fun. I have never been so happy to see my bed. I promptly-well, no actually my body was doubled over with pain in a 90degree angle, so nothing was done promptly- let's say as soon as was practicable-I crawled into it and stayed there for a good 17hours. Hot. I have to now take a moment to give a shout-out to my roommate, Shannon, who played Mom and made me chicken noodle soup AND woke me up to give me my four-hour dosage of tylenol to bring my fever down. Mad props, Shanny.

- I managed to drag myself back to work for the rest of the week (although Friday was a mistake), but don't worry, the weekend arrived in time for me to feel all better! For doing such a good job at getting better I took myself out for a treat to Casa del Cafe on Saturday morning for a balanced breakfast of three cups of coffee and a gi-normous slab of carrot cake. And then came home to a big ol' pool party (during which I may or may not have whacked myself in the eye with a wrench while trying to open a bottle. Its a long story and I much prefer to tell the one where I got in a fight "and you should see the other guy!"). For the size of bruise I got, it was relatively painless. I never thought having a tough face would be an important life-skill, but maybe if things don't work out with MEDA I have a boxing career.

-Sunday night, yes, that glorious, magical evening, was spent with Fergie, will.i.am, taboo, and .... Apl.de.ap (that other guy). That would be Black Eyed Peas for those who have other musical tastes. I don't think I would have ever bothered to go to this concert in Canada, but people do funny things in foreign countries. Why not? And by gosh, by golly am I thankful I did! There's fact that I have COMPLETELY overlooked Taboo up until now, and thank you Wendy for drawing my attention to this oversight:

Wendy, pensively: Kiki, do you think he's sexy?"

Kiki without a pause: "Not at all."

Wendy: Oh. ok.

Pause

Head begins to cock...

Kiki: "wait a minute..."

Wendy:"ok see!! yes!"

But then also, there is the fact that now I will not rest until I too, like Fergie, have a pair of not just skinny jeans, but shimmering, GOLD skinny jeans.

[Caveat: I realise that this is an about-face from previous tune I have sung before. Heck, a year ago I was hating on all the indie emo-kids and the petite beautiful girls who could pull off the skinny jeans shouting "Tapered!! Those are nothing more than tapered jeans!!" but then something changed, there is no natural explanation, because I am all over those like a fat kid on a smartie- and I feel no shame. Next stop, GOLD. There's no stopping me now!!]

Well on that note, you now know how I have been filling my days. I have to gather my REAL thoughts on what this is all about, and I will fill you in soon, but for now, here is some proof that these aren't wild and flagrant lies. Enjoy!

posted by Kiki @ 6:41 p.m.